The Pursuit of Happiness

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

Preamble to the U.S. Constitution

I can't help it. I've grown to love the Constitution. Law school has a way of doing that. Lately, I've been thinking about this particular sentence, even more - a particular phrase. The pursuit of happiness. Why must happiness be pursued? The founders of our country didn't admonish us to pursue life or liberty. But happiness? Happiness must be chased.

It is elusive.

To me, irony and the beauty of God live in this sentence. The irony is the Creator gave you the inalienable right to pursue happiness, while the answer to happiness, the only lasting source of happiness, lies in the Creator.

The beauty of God is that He should stand ready to embrace us even after our hearts have thrown themselves at every passing fancy, hoping a material thing, status, job, applause or person will satisfy their hunger for happiness, will give them rest from searching so they can enjoy life.

The Creator didn't send us out on a hopeless course. The journey ends where it began.

Psalm 16:11
You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

A Sudden End

Against my wishes, my body and Caleb have decided that we are done nursing. 

It started with a restless morning. Caleb was busy chattering away and pointing at things instead of getting to the task at hand. I redirected him. He took a few gulps and got busy climbing off the bed. "Child, I am not chasing you around to make this happen. Do you want any more?" "Nah-nah." 

I tried again that afternoon, knowing that skipping my only nursing session of the day would mean my body would be sending a Cease-The-Supply signal. Same routine. A few sucks, and on to more interesting things.

 

The kids brain is on fire. I can watch him thinking. It's amazing, but distracting. While comforting, nursing is not interesting, or at least not as interesting to Caleb as pulling at the threads in his quilt or rearranging his diapers.

Unlike the previous day, he was ready to nurse the next morning. He settled in close and put his little hand on my arm. He was on for a few minutes. Then, hysterical crying. 

The well is dry, my friends. 

He was too sad to keep trying, which - you mommas know - is the only way to tell your body to make more. 

Don't worry, he cheered up in about four seconds and decided that he had other things to do. He also sucked down several sippy cups of good 'ole fashioned cow's milk throughout the day. He is just shy of fifteen months. 

I can't say I'm devastated. I've enjoyed nursing Caleb and was hoping to make it to at least 18 months. But it's easier to share the job of parenting when either parent has the tools to complete the task at hand. And, as much as Paul loves to help in every possible way, he could not nurse the baby.

Nursing is over. As crazy as it sounds, that means Caleb's one step closer to independence. As I held him in my arms this morning, with the sun filtering through the clouds, making his skin glow, I put my face against his and inhaled. I smelled his baby-ness, felt the softness of his cheek and then pulled my head away to look into his brown eyes. He held my gaze and then burst out laughing. He won't remember these moments, but I will.     

  

Nothing Happens . . . Then Everything Happens

For the past 3.5 years we have lived in a place we love.

My parent's basement. 

We've loved it for many reasons. The biggest, of course, are the two amazing people we get to see every single day. Which also means Caleb gets to see them every single day. They are the most generous, gracious, easy-going people I know. Their faith in Jesus Christ is evident in even the smallest details of their lives: from resolving conflict, to serving others even when they have a million things to do, to taking time to listen and share.

Our journey has taken some turns we didn't expect, including the latest one: a house of our own.

It's old.

It's a foreclosure.



It's perfect for us.